So sorry to get your attention and then disappoint you. But you didn’t really think there was a magic pill that could take away all your worries and turn your world into Wonderland, right?
Of course not! It’s just wishful thinking. We all want to believe that we can blink and click our proverbial heels and turn things around. We can’t.
In fact, there is only one sure thing you can do to make yourself “feel” a little better while you are (hopefully) working on doing what’s necessary to physically change the challenges you are facing. (And, if you can’t change them, you can be working on coming to terms with them.)
So, reality check time! The one way to feel better, right now, is to change your attitude. Change the way you see something or think about something and you will feel differently about it instantly. Don’t believe us? According to a post on Happyologist, you can do one of three things when facing a challenge.
- Complain about it!
Talk about it to everyone you know. Post about it on social media. Journal about it. Just focus completely on the exact thing that’s bothering you. Lament how bad you feel and compare yourself to others thinking “woe is me.”
- Change your attitude!
This may sound easier than it is. But, truthfully, you have the power within you to think differently right - this - minute. Try to view the problem from a different vantage point. How about instead of “woe is me” you start thinking “I can fix this. I know people who can help. Time really does heal.”
Don’t focus on the problem, but instead the resolution. If you have been trying to fix the issue and can’t, why not try something different?
Consider what is great about your life at this moment. Put the problem into perspective; how important will it be in a week, a month or a year?
Whether your challenge is love, career or health (or anything else), the first step to getting on the other side of it is to believe you can. Stop saying “I can’t” and change your attitude to: “I can and I WILL!) One idea might be getting off the couch and trying something new.
As the author of the Happyologist article wrote, “if you change your attitude you can change your life. We are all constantly faced with all kinds of challenges, both big and small. That’s a fact of life. We can’t run away from that even if we tried. But by changing our attitude we can approach them from a more empowering angle and as a result continue to feel happy with ourselves and our lives even when faced with them.”
You tell your friends all about it. You feel frustrated. You want them to join in on the frustration. Together you moan about the problem you’re faced with.
I get it. Problems suck. They make your life harder. But that’s not a good enough reason for you to simply complain about it. That’s taking the easy way out. Imagine if everyone who had a problem would complain about it? The world would be a pretty negative place! That’s why I’m asking you to re-think this.
Sure, if you feel like you need to get a bit of a vent or rant out, do it. But give yourself a time limit for doing it. And once you’ve done it, be done with it. Finito. No more complaining. Why? Because complaining sends you into a negative spiral that will make you feel even more frustrated and helpless. Then it will be even more difficult to see the problem in a more positive light or try to find a solution for it. Then the risk is that you get stuck into a deep, dark hole of complaints that you can’t seem to climb out of. This is even more powerful if you bring others into it as then you will be sending them down into a negative spiral too – and together you’ll be keeping each other down.
So what should you actually do? Once you’re finished with your ‘complaining rant’, – or have made the choice not to complain at all – try and solve the problem.